If I Fall For You
by APhoenixRising
Summary: If I fall for you, I'll never recover, If I fall for you, I'll never be the same. - Love Somebody, Maroon 5 /AlScor and never being the same once you're in love


**Written for the Big Sis/Lil Sis Competition: Round 6 and the Pairing Diversity Boot Camp: oblivious**

**If I Fall For You**

_If I fall for you, I'll never recover,_

_If I fall for you, I'll never be the same._

- Love Somebody, Maroon 5

I know the exact point when my life fell apart.

It was when Albus Severus Potter stumbled into it, literally. One day I was the Slytherin Prince, revelling in the glory, fame and power that my name garnered. Then Albus fell into me and I could no longer call myself a Malfoy; from that moment onwards I was a spider. A spider spinning a web of lies, that all centred around him: the perfect Gryffindor. I couldn't believe what was going on in my mind, what Malfoy _ever_ had been attracted to the same sex?

I knew my Father would be disappointed in me; I couldn't carry on the name, the name that he worked so hard to restore. So I made myself believe it was just a phase; I couldn't possibly be in love with a person who epitomises everything I'm not. I could be in love with a Potter, especially a _male _Potter!

And it worked. Well, at least for a while it did. But then came Sixth year and the smaller classes. The fates weren't with me when we got put together as partners in Potions and it wasn't long until I was falling in love all over again. All the feelings that I'd pushed down for so long made an extremely unwilling return. Oh, don't get me wrong, I love the feeling of being in love. The nervous butterflies, the flutter when you see _that _person.

The aspect that made it worse was that it was unrequited, only a fool would believe that he could love me back. A fool. It was all I'd ever be, a hopelessly in love, romantic fool.

So that's how I come to be here now, wandering around the dungeons on my last ever day of school. It hurts. Not the completing of my education, but knowing that after the Feast tonight I might not see Albus' face again. Seeing him gives me a new sense of who I really am. When I see him, I know that I'm in love with him, so I'm afraid that when he won't be around, that I'll get manipulated, forced into being with someone who I know deep down I can never love.

Sometimes I think I belong down here in the dungeons; it's bleak, cold and so unbearably lonely. My future. The future that I so desperately don't want but will more or less have to settle for. Maybe that's why I feel so at home here, because I've already settled on having to live like this.

I settle against the side of the wall, letting the slight warmth of a nearby flame wash over me, and think about what the next few weeks have in store for me. I sink lower and lower down the wall as a rush of images overtakes me, threatening to blind me into believing them. I throw my hands in front of my eyes, and just then a slight breeze flies over my legs on the ground, and I hear the voice I both do and don't want to hear.

'Scorpius?' says Albus questioningly. I don't reply, don't even look up, afraid of what I might do or say. That doesn't deter him; he comes and sits next to me. I can't decide if I want this or not. His proximity is something I've kind of got used to during the long hours preparing potions but this is different. I can feel it, and so can he, I think.

'Scorpius?' he asks again. 'Why are you here? Why aren't you getting ready for the feast?'

'Can't,' I reply, not daring myself to look up.

'Can't what? That's ridiculous.'

'Leave it, yeah?'

'No! That's stupid. Why would you want to spend all your time down here alon-'

'It's because of you!' I shout. I lower my voice. 'If I went to the feast, I'd have to see you and I can't be dealing with the fact that you can have everything you want and I can't.'

'And what is it you want?'

'You?' I whisper. I hear his head lean back on the wall.

'Oh, Scorpius,' he breathes. 'If you only knew...'

'Knew what?' I say as I finally turn towards him, he's got a smirk on his face and he's looking more mischievous than I've ever seen him before.

'Knew that what I really want is right in front of me, at this very moment.'

'What?' I gasp, in shock at what has just come out of his mouth.

'You're what I've wanted for a long time. How could you be so oblivious? You've been so concerned in your own pity that you haven't stopped and seen that I've been watching you ever since the beginning of fourth year. Now, don't be a fool and let's go for dinner.' He holds out his hand and I blindly grab it and follow him towards the Great Hall.

That was the point when my life began to reseal itself.


End file.
